014: "u mad?": The 5 Best Rap Beefs Of All-Time (#4)

#4: 50 Cent Vs. Rick Ross

A clear lesson in "careful what you wish for". Though the origins of the feud are mysterious and various (the most popular belief is that Rick Ross dropped the initial warning shot after 50 allegedly looked at him funny at some awards show), the feud ended up terribly for the Miami-based rapper as his past as a correctional officer came to light, largely destroying the credibility he had built for himself.

50 Cent, never one to shy away, decided to use his website as a soapbox from which to fire off video after video, mocking the Miami-based rapper and Ross cohort DJ Khaled. In one particularly strange incident, the NY-based rapper even threatened Khaled's mom. This feud showed Curtis Jackson's truly fucked-up persona as bizzare video after bizarre video was rolled out. 50 hangs out with Rick Ross's ex-baby mama, who helped give 50 ammo in the form of pictures and videos of Ross in his pseudo-cop uniform. 50 also managed to unearth a sex tape (which is definite NSFW territory) with Ross's current baby mama, narrating it in his Pimpin' Curly persona. Ross managed to walk away from this somewhat unscathed. Sure, his reputation and persona as a drug-pushin', law-ignoring son-of-a-bitch took a hit, but he continued on his way, merrily playing a character he fashioned for himself. 50 released two mixtapes and continually pushes back his newest studio record. Perhaps by 2011 we'll see it come out.

Unfortunately, unlike the majority of the beefs, this wasn't kept on wax too much, but the level of amusement and the sheer amount of material 50 came out with in order to totally bury Rick Ross is astounding. Some may even contend that 50 and his network of folks put in just a bit too much work. But maybe that's just me asking too much.

013: Apologies, Then We Get Down To Some Wu-Related Business

This blog has laid dormant long enough... At least as far as my output is concerned. I feel like my stupid, meaningless opinions and ideas need to continue onwards, and as such, I command thee, blog, to RISE.

Ahem.
Hm.
Fuck.
Anyways...

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The Wu-Tang Clan is a vast army of slang-slinging, an enterprising group of hustlers who have no lost love for each other. But brotherhood is brotherhood and as such, they've managed to put out collective albums that have lasted beyond the ages. Hell, even their last record wasn't that bad. But their vast wealth of solo material available continues to boggle the mind as all 9 members (even Ol' Dirty Bastard, from beyond the grave) continue to put releases out that vary vastly in quality, so in that spirit we'll be looking at some of the great (and downright terrible) records members have put out.

Top 5 solo albums

5. Ol' Dirty Bastard - Return To The 36 Chambers: The Dirty Version
ODB, bless his heart, was at his very core a man always struggling in-between being the designated wildcard of the group and trying to find some semblance of artistic integrity. Joe Bananas tiptoed that high-wire very deftly on this, his first record. Released in the aftermath of the ultra-successful 36 Chambers album (as well as Method Man's platinum-selling debut) and with production duties largely handled by Wu architect RZA, Russell Jones starts his album off with an eccentric 5-minute intro that sees him quoting Blowfly and pretending to emote through a series of feelings he can't seem to properly project. At first glance a strange left-turn, it makes perfect sense for a man known mostly for his comic-like antics. From then on ODB manages to bring the ruckus all on his own with the piano-driven 'Shimmy Shimmy Ya', before moving on to the vastly under-rated 'Raw Hide' (which features great verses from Meth and Raekwon). The album continues to astound with stellar track 'Brooklyn Zoo' (and its sequel, Brooklyn Zoo II) as well as several posse cuts. The real winners here are the beats RZA constructs for Big Baby Jesus: playful, vibrant, resonant with the personality spitting lyrical on it. An album that steps out of the standard rap pattern and delivers a product that is full of unforeseen twists and turns, engaging the listener far more than typical rap fare.

4. GZA - Liquid Swords
The first Wu member to wrangle himself a record deal prior to the group's debut album, the Genius jumps outta the gate as part of the first-wave of post 36 Chambers releases. The RZA once again comes to the rescue on this album, orchestrating a collection of dusty beats that feel as if they were laying dormant decades prior to being utilized by the GZA. The intro sample, lifted from 1980's Shogun Assassin, sets the mood for the rest of the album: rapper as warrior, man as a creature constantly seeking conflict. Spiritual, introspective and laid back, the record brings the goods consistently, the GZA's almost-mumbled prose definitive, his aim sure. The RZA and the GZA both hit the mark on this one.

3. Ghostface Killah - Fishscale
Ghostface Killah is perhaps the most soulful of the Wu-Tang set. His albums have always been chock-full of soul-based, string-laden beats that find the Wallabee Champ perpetually living in a '70s haze. Ghostface is also gifted with the inate ability to tell stories with such gusto and a keen eye for detail that following Ghost down the lyrical rabbit hole as he spits is no easy task, but rewarding if done right. Dude is more enthralling than most suspense flicks and it feels as though he finally combines his most gangster moments along with some grasps at his ladies man persona, careful to appear thug even through his most difficult moments. It doesn't hurt that the stellar production on the album brings out the best in Ghost, as he comes full circle, combining the best parts of his prior albums. Debut solo album Ironman was too hard on the gangster tip, and follow-ups Supreme Clientele, Bulletproof Wallets and Pretty Toney Album found Ghost relying a bit too much on the soulful atmosphere he so loves, creating an uneven output that finally coalesces into a complete package on this album. Oh, and just for kicks, the album ends on one of the best posthumous Biggie collabs you will ever hear, as if the album couldn't get any better.

2. Raekwon - Only Built 4 Cuban Linx...
Raekwon is definitely one of those 'practice what you preach' fellahs. The man, who during his tenure in Camp Wu, has allegedly spent his free time involved in various illicit activities (as corroborted by the RZA), helped pioneer the mafia gangster genre. Along with Jay-Z's debut album and albums by Nas and AZ, this strictly New York phenom quickly spread to the rest of the country, inspiring many. This landmark, street-tough release found Rae living up to his chef moniker. The dude was on fire, enlisting the help of Ghostface Killah throughout most of the disc as his lyrical cohort, extolling the virtues of a drug-dealin', mafia-inspired, enemy-hating lifestyle. Raekwon's subsequent output has been far inferior to his debut release, marked by repetitive lyrics and boring production, rarely living up to his abilities to enthusiastically come at the genre as he should. Rae himself has acknowledged this fact and the forthcoming OB4CL2 should slay, given the fact that we've all been waiting 15 years for a proper follow-up.

1. Method Man - Tical
Bring The Pain. Meth Vs. Chef. All I Need. Release Yo Delf. Case closed.
Actually, not so fast. The dirty and down-low production (the beats had to be reconstructed in a matter of days by the RZA after an accident destroyed the originals) add a distinctive flavour. Meth as a street hustler, bringing in the ladies with promises of growing old together. Lots of great guest spots and Meth definitely shows up to play on every track. Simply mesmerizing, musically and lyrically. To understand is to listen. Over and over.

4 Wu albums that disappointed

4. Wu-Tang Forever
Now I know I'm gonna catch some shit, but damn. The second group album (a two-disc marathon) was wildly inconsistent, spreading material thin and giving the world subpar solo joints. Stand-out cut (and first single) 'Triumph' sets itself apart from an album of boring, forgettable raps. Concise is the key to victory in the land of the Wu, and this album is a product of excess, of celebrity and an unsureness about where to go next on the part of the RZA, who applies a 'throw it against the wall and see what sticks' approach, trying to cater to whoever will listen.

3. The World According to the RZA
The RZA decided to use his clout as an industry figure to put out, for all intents and purposes, what one would consider a compilation album of rap acts from around the world. Label politics forced him to release this as a solo record, and he does sporadically show up to spit, though he leaves that largely up to the contributors. A strange pele-mele of various styles and languages that is nothing beyond a novelty, unfortunately. Stick to Bobby Digi releases and we won't have a problem. Also has the fuckin' worst album cover ever. 1994 called, they want their shitty fonts and halo effect back.

2. Raekwon - Immobilarity
From riveting gangster accounts to overdone and droning. This follow-up to OB4CL finds Rae trying to display the fact that he can go out on his own, eliminating one of the features that made his debut memorable (the exclusion of Ghostface), utilizing other guests sparingly over RZA Lite beats from producers who studied the Wu Architect and tried their best to sound like him. It goes nowhere quickly, and is worth barely a second listen. The Chef keeps the drug element around but is unsure about how to best talk about it, instead just relating hood stories in a tone that makes him sound bored. Also, it has the worst Method Man guest appearance I've ever witnessed. Meth, sounding thin and haunted, delivers line after line in an off-putting cadence.

1. Method Man - Judgment Day
Bloated, skit-loaded, boring. The follow-up to Tical fails in every respect, barely containing any of the memorable tracks that made Tical a classic. A truly sad moment. No keepers. Who the fuck wants to listen to a skit that's merely an 8-second phone call from Donald Trump? No one. That shit ain't gangsta in the least, it's tacky and shitty. Fuck. Thankfully, Meth's recent output has changed the current of my feelings towards his work.

3 solo collabs that make you say "hold up"

3. Beyonce feat. Ghostface Killah - Summertime

2. Shaquille O'Neal feat. The RZA and Method Man - No Hooks

1. Mariah Carey feat. Ol' Dirty Bastard - Fantasy

2 Wu-Tang members that should forever work together

Ghostface Killah and Raekwon. Have appeared together on countless songs, and continue to collabo to maximum effect to this day. The ying and the yang, the sun and the moon, the obvious and the metaphorical. They complement each other, almost like rap's Hall and Oates. Good apart, stellar together.

The most consistent Wu member
Without a doubt, Ghostface. Even his lesser albums feature engaging production and several rough gems to enjoy. Ghost is fearless, flirting with pure R&B tracks and guesting on tracks that you wouldn't normally associate him with. There is something for everyone on all of his tracks, and he's usually engrossing, lyrically-speaking. Also, he has a song all about being Santa-like. Who can't get behind that?

007: "u mad?": The 5 Best Rap Beefs Of All-Time (#5)

So I've been accused of being too-long winded in my blog entries, and that's all fine and dandy. So, in stark contrast to some philosophical bullshit I may spew out, I'm just going to simply let the music do the talking.

#5: G-Unit Vs. The Game

Any rap beef that escalates to the point where it forces a reputable wordsmith to put out a 15-minute diss track that lives up to its hype definitely constitutes a decent feud.

The Game gets brought into the G-Unit fold at the urging of Aftermath's Dr. Dre. Being the first prominent signee (barring Dre, who was kind of the architect of this entire empire) from the West Coast, The Game had a bit of trouble fitting in. Tempers flared during the recording of The Game's first album, The Documentary. The Game wasn't playing nice (disrespecting 50 by appearing on a track recorded by Joe Budden, a perrenial 50 target as well as showing up in a Jim Jones video, too) and the plot to have the stable of artists work together quickly fell apart.

Game kept yelling out 'G-Unot' wherever he could (even in 50's backyard), angering the G-Unit clique. 50 then claimed to have written the rhymes on one-third of The Documentary and that The Game's second album would surely flop. The many-on-one attack (the G-Unit roster vs. The Game, all on his own) showed the fact that The Game could take on a multitude of attackers all at once and still hold his own, becoming a formidable, wordy opponent.

The feud died down after the release of '300 Bars', but the mantle was picked up by G-Unit member Young Buck and G-Unit affiliate Spider Loc, who released a bunch of tracks on mixtapes aimed at The Game. He, in turn, bided his time and the last move made in the feud (semi-officially, or as officially as people consider mixtapes to be) was a song released in May 2008 called 'Our Turn', from one of the Black Wall Street mixtapes. This feud still lies dormant, though it may rear its amusing head some day soon. Until then, 50 will continue to wear a wig and act stupid.

004.5: Sabbath > You (Counterpoint)

Being a life-long fan of most of Sabbath's catalogue (yes little Billy, Hastie even likes late '80s Sabbath), I feel the need to clear up some points Manley may have not thought of while composing his last entry.

Firstly, check out the title track of their self-titled debut. Sabbath guitarist-cum-god Tony Iommi makes effective use of the Devil's Third. Also known as the diabolus in musica, the thing just reeks of scary. The three notes employed by Iommi handily do the trick over a drawn-out, nightmarish backbeat. The story the Ozzman telleth is one of seeing a spirit (possibly even Satan!) that actually happened to bassist Geezer Butler before Sabbath's formation. Close your eyes and listen to the 6-minute opus and then then wonder if there's a sense of danger in there. I do belive there is.

No one at this time was making music that was inherently evil at the time. Their peers, like Pentagram, didn't start up until 4 or 5 years after Sabbath's apparition. Sabbath was, as Manley noted, singular and so didn't have a preset path to follow. Some of their riffs were based around blues-rock, sure, but Iommi also recognized the need to amp it up and so in a live setting he plays loud as fuck (employing multiple Laney stacks) and tunes down to C. He played beyond those blues riffs and created his own brand of riffing that incites instant recognition. How's that for powerful-sounding?

Secondly, Electric Funeral. The song itself, a testament to apocalyptic war, is aided by another nasty riff and Ozzy's lower register. Shit just sounds EVIL (even live). Ozzy's "crooning" works effectively here once more.

Watching Ozzy cover 'In My Life' isn't considering the fact that he makes/made up one-fourth of the members of Sabbath. One latter-day piece of work by one member of the band doesn't necessarily taint the whole band, I feel. Also, Tony Iommi's Iommi album features a host of screamers and screechers on there anyways.

Similarly, I could argue that watching HORSE The Band cover the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles song lowers them down by sounding like a second-rate punk band throughout most of the song. They don't sound evil, they sound snotty and and whiny, like prepubescent teeangers extolling their love of cartoons, but that would be taking the entirety of their music out of context too.

Manley's problem is that he equates fast music with evil. All of the bands he listed as contemporaries love to play fast. Sabbath's idea of being a lumbering giant in the night, destroying the shit out of stuff with giant prodding footsteps is in stark contrast to Manley's quest for speed, and therefore evil. Staying at a certain BPM (usually under 100) automatically takes a band out of the running for "evil".

Manley's assertion that Sabbath are just "a heavier, gloomier version of the Beatles parading around like they're the most evil and Satanic thing on the planet" is plainly false. When's the last time the Beatles wrote a song about the perils of cocaine? Or about the horrors of the war in Vietnam? Or about hell? No other band dealt with these aspects head-on, preferring to drape their musings in heavy metaphors for fear of being labelled 'Satanic'. The Beatles were all about having a good time and keeping their songs at the 3 minute mark, something that the Sabs blatantly disregarded. The Beatles embraced radio play while Black Sabbath never went looking for it, preferring the tried-and-true live route as the big way to gaining more fans.

The differences listed above are integral to each band's make-up. The Beatles were a pop band because their songs were cheery and radio-friendly, their albums packaged in a message of peace and love. Black Sabbath were angry and confused, their songs overtly long and only finding a pseudo-home once FM radio came to prominence in the '70s and even then played sparingly. Pop music's main objective is to reach as many people as possible (hence the popular moniker). Sabbath understood that they were a niche, an acquired taste, a real alternative to the Led Zeppelins, Deep Purples and Yes' of the day. Zeppelin, who definitely copped a few (dozen) riffs from the blues-rock domain sang about love and hot summer days. Yes crafted intricate concept albums that emphasized the use of synthesizers and a distinctive sonic space. Deep Purple similarly looked towards synth use as a primary vehicle for their music, as well as the need to jam things out in a live setting, like their 'Stairway to Heaven' brethren. Sabbath stood in defiance, offering up songs in a live setting that had a little bit of tweaking but largely remained the same, offering up a selection of evil-sounding songs and a message of danger.

Sure, the occasional love song would slip into Sabbath's repertoire ('Sabbath Cadabra' comes to mind), but they were mostly a bunch of evil-sounding Negative Nancys. Sabbath understood their place in the world and continued onwards, undettered. I do believe they sound evil and threatening, and are far removed from the pop moniker Manley wishes to attach to them.

NOTE: I've decided to stick with the "classic" '70s line-up due to the fact that they managed to stay together for most of the decade and have a lasting legacy. Dio's involvement in Black Sabbath/Heaven and Hell was all start-stop-start-stop and the various incarnation of the band in the '80s and '90s make it hard to judge because of lack of consistency.

004: Sabbath Bloody Sabbath

I got into a bunch of hot water with Hastie a week or so ago. He was extolling the virtues of Black Sabbath (much as he extolled the virtues of DMX yesterday) and I was having none of it. He was all "Sabbath bla bla bla" and "Ozzy bla bla bla" and I was like "Nuh-uhh."

My thinking was, Black Sabbath is a band built around a concept. That concept is that they are evil. It's pretty basic. Their name is Black Sabbath, and literally everything they do is draped and shrouded in gloom, murk, doom, and terror. It's the essential conceit of metal music. Just like rap: we are harder than you. Now just as rap has its Will Smiths, metal has its Mike Pattons as well. But the majority of metal bands are hell-bent for leather on seeming tough and evil and mysterious. It's why they use Latin words as song titles, it's why Scandinavia has produced so many seminal metal bands, and so on. In many cases, the posturing works.

Why does it work? Because the music backs it up by actually sounding evil. This is where my problem with Sabbath comes in: they don't. They don't fucking sound evil. They don't sound scary. I remember watching a video of Ozzy doing an acoustic cover of the Beatles' "In My Life" a few years ago and there was nothing incongruous about it. For one, Ozzy doesn't have a particularly intimidating voice. For two, he doesn't really push it to its limits. He doesn't scream, he doesn't growl. He sings. He practically fucking croons. And for three, the music he sings over is... blues-based rock. It's not very heavy, it's not very fast. It doesn't sound like it's going to tear the shit out of your house. It... it's just not powerful-sounding.

Now, the main thing to keep in mind here is that it's not Sabbath's fault. They are old as hell. When they were getting started, there were no pre-existing metal bands for them to evolve from. They represent a logical step in the progression of music from black American blues to white British rock and so on through the NWOBHM and then to the present. Without them, none of the heavy music I respect—Cancer Bats, Protest the Hero, Propagandhi, Genghis Tron, HORSE the Band, etc.—would probably ever have come to be. But when it comes to that short path between my ears and my brain, they leave me dissatisfied. I like Chuck Berry and I like the Rolling Stones. Sabbath? Not so much. They're a heavier, gloomier version of the Beatles parading around like they're the most evil and Satanic thing on the planet. Please.

So. I will stick to listening to Trap Them—who sound like the sort of horrific, shit-tearing-up music that I mentally associate with Sabbath's posturing—and Hastie can have his old-school metal.

Coming Later: Part 2: Why this doesn't apply to The Clash, but does apply to the Sex Pistols.